Day 2 - Post-Post-Apocalypse

The results are in!  I looked over all of them and they seem pretty consistent - no huge drops or significant changes.  I wouldn't say my health suffered and I wouldn't say it was optimal, but I'm also not a doctor.  One surprising result is that I gained weight.  I am not sure if it was food choice or maybe shift in metabolism due to irregular eating patterns.

There are a few things that I have come to appreciate/notice/understand having transitioned back to buying food:

1. Transitioning felt a little like that scene in 'The Shawshank Redemption', where the guy gets out of prison and he just can't cope with life out of the pen.  I felt a little lost and reluctant to purchase food at first.  Fortunately for me, it was 3 months and not like 20 years, so the feeling passed within a day.  Truly, lasting new habits only require a few months to take shape and form. 
2. Being able to choose the food you eat is so much better for your spirit than being confined to a certain set of choices.  This seems obvious.  Some days it was like this great adventure and others I looked to food for comfort; the latter days were the most difficult.  There is a discipline that arises from making do with what you have and being grateful that you at least have something.  Sometimes my body would ask for fresh veggies and that wasn't something I could always provide.  I could feel that voice get a little smaller, as if it had decided there was no use in speaking if the request couldn't be fulfilled. 
3. I completely understand why some food banks have a list of items they want and don't want.  My sister has a food bank project with Langley this year and the list explicitly says 'no boxed Kraft Dinner/Mr. Noodles' and 'no soups without vegetables'.  Last year, I was of the mind-set that they should be grateful to receive food.  This year I see how variety and nutritional options can be helpful to opening possibility space and encouraging growth.
4. Fresh foods that I have selected taste fantastic!  Deprivation increases sensation, for sure.  Yesterday I had lettuce with balsamic vinegar and olive oil - it felt like after 3 months of camping, I had just taken a shower at home.
5. Would I do it again?  Yes.  However, I don't think I can ever really repeat this unless something external forces me to no longer be able to purchase groceries.  A big part of it was being unprepared for the experience.  Not stocking up on food beforehand.  If you know you will do this, you subconsciously prepare and plan, I think.

December blood test results

Day 90 - This is the end

Well, this is it.  Yesterday marked 90 days (I think I lost track of the actual days somehow.  But I started September 6, 2011 and October had 31 days, so really December 5, 2011 is the end date).  I learned a lot and grew tremendously from this little experiment.

I took the last blood test today and will post the results in a few days, once I receive them.

I began with a look inside my pantry, so it seems fitting to end with the pantry.  I think I could go another few weeks...The spice cabinet is still pretty full.  I only ran out of curry powder and black pepper.  I was using these spices pretty heavily to cover anything that didn't taste great. 

ghee, apple cider vinegar, hemp hearts, misc. asian soy/hot sauces

frozen kale and blackberries in the container (all local, organic, and urban foraged)

a lot of kelp...cornmeal, senna leaf, ~1 cup flour and oats, black sesame in the back

poppy-seeds, steel-cut oats, icing sugar, molasses, some kind of buckwheat?

vega powder, jars of kombucha, rancid pine nuts, yeast, miso, tbsp margarine, banana, beer (holding it for a friend)

looks like the nuts from last christmas will see another

Day 87 - It's a Lifestyle!!

On Friday all my meals were on Kumon - first there was the corporate Kumon party at the Sandbar on Granville Island (salad, wild mushroom risotto, lemon tart with raspberry coulis) and then there was the Kumon Willowbrook party (Panago's pizza, my fave, hot chocolate, gingerbread cookies and lots of candy).  The holidays are a wonderful opportunity to revel in free meals.

Today I went to the Kumon East First Avenue grand opening and I won a door prize!!!

it's a giant chocolate egg

it's also hollow with a giant egg inside

For dinner, I decided it was time to use the crown jewel of my supplies - the can of lentil soup left behind by a friend visiting for a few weeks.  I truly, truly understand why canned goods are such a great thing for food banks and just in general.  I grew up in a house-hold that never relied on cans for meals, so it was very foreign.  I am amazed that a can that has been in my cupboard for at least half a year can be dumped in a pot and heated into a fantastic dinner.  Canned food is underrated.

space-age technology

Final Thought: My sister's fiancé has taken to asking me if I am, "still doing that diet"?  I wouldn't describe this as a diet anymore than I would describe being 'gay' as a diet.  The nutrition angle is more of a corollary of the main objective, which is letting go, having faith in the abundance and mystery of the universe.

Day 85 - The Brownie Bite

Back in October I received a coupon for a free brownie at the Guildford Moxie's connected to the Sandman Suites (Surrey swank).  For every coupon redeemed Moxie's donates $1 to the Breakfast for Learning program.  This is a pretty sweet deal for all parties.  However, I had been reluctant to redeem this coupon as the implication is that a patron would likely order other items with the free brownie.  The coupon expires today... 

While I didn't necessarily need to eat this brownie (I have more than enough to last me the next 5 days), I couldn't ignore this feeling that I was avoiding the coupon because I would feel like a total deadbeat redeeming it.  I feared that the waitstaff would think I was cheap, that I would be looked at as someone who was somehow less than.  To live this experiment to the fullest, I had to go.

I didn't know anyone who worked there, yet I felt as if I had been transported back to high school.  To clarify, high school wasn't great for me.  To quote 'Dazed and Confused', "I keep getting older, and they stay the same [age]."  If this were some kind of short story, this would be cathartic epiphany of sorts instead of mildly angst-ridden.  But how about that brownie?

it's a 'blond' brownie. exotic!

I sat in the lounge and wrote some thoughts as I enjoyed my brownie and hot water with lemon.  I wondered how much of a tip to leave.  This was a very tortured series of minutes.  Do I leave a tip?  If I don't does this prove that I have truly transcended caring what people think of me?  If I realise this thought does that then negate it because I am trying to prove that point?  It was aggravating.  I finally decided that I would leave a $2 tip (60% of what the brownie would have cost) because I'm sure the waitress who brought me the brownie could use it for cab fare from the Mirage later on.  I wish this post could be tied up with a neat bow; instead it's a little loose in the middle and one end is much shorter than the other.

Day 82 - Fresh Slice Day

The new Fraser Heights Fresh Slice is attached to a gas station, which means it is more of a kiosk than a restaurant.  It was super-busy and the numerous staff members seemed really bewildered and unhappy to be there.  When I arrived around 1:30pm there were 2 choices of cold pizza slices: pepperoni or cheese.  Having said that, I was grateful to have food.  However, I would not likely pay $1.56 for a slice from here.

The coupon was good for 1 free XL slice of pizza.  Turns out, there is only one size.

free pizza!

Day 80 - Tmrw is Fresh Slice Day

Tomorrow I will go to the new Fresh Slice opening in Fraser Heights to redeem a coupon for one free XL slice.  The catch is that it must be redeemed between 1 and 3pm.  Looking forward to it.  I could eat pizza for 3 months. 

Today marks 10 days to the end of this little experiment.  What's interesting is that I've saved some of my best items to this point - can of lentil soup, half a box of couscous, a potato, a quarter bag of brown rice spaghetti noodles.

Day 78 - Another Gift!

Started feeling the cobwebs cloud my inner-landscape.  Hormones?  Attachment to form? SAD?  Don't know.  I decided to shake it off with a walk to find yarn.  It's that time of the year where I pick up my knitting needles and re-learn how to knit, purl, knit, purl, purl, purl, knit?...oops...unravel that row.  As I walked along 104th avenue, I happened to see a bag of bananas in an empty lot amidst paint cans, coffee cups, and wet sweatshirts.  There were about 12 in the bag and they were bruised and rather moist, as if they had breathed the humidity lining the bag.

I took this gift to my parents' house and made an assortment of breads and muffins for my family to enjoy (with 4 left over for waffles).

The last few days have been rather mysterious.  These gifts are love notes left anonymously on my doorstep, offerings of a sort, that reveal only the existence of my intangible beloved: no eyes, no ears, no nose, no tongue, no body, no mind.

Day 76 - Winds of Fortune

Last night the strong winter winds redistributed leaves...and goods, it would appear!  I was leaving to enjoy a wintery walk to redeem a coupon for a McDonald's deluxe hot chocolate, when I found this on my doorstep:

apple cider, anyone?

I cut off the bitten part because you can never be too sure about rabies or hand-and-foot-and-mouth disease and juiced the rest into a lovely warming elixir:

It is funny how the universe answers your calls - sometimes in the most obvious ways.

Day 73 - Freebasing Chocolate

I have my period and incidentally a huge craving for chocolate...I know, I know.  What to do?  Well, when you have 2 unsweetened squares of Baker's chocolate, you make macaroons (sans le coconut).

les ingredients

You might notice that suddenly I have this huge tub of vegetable oil shortening - where did that come from?  Turns out, I have a reserve of fats that I use to make soap.  This is about a year old, but it doesn't smell rancid.

Ingredients:

• 1/4 cup of vegetable oil shortening (vintage 1 year)
• 2 Baker's unsweetened chocolate squares
• about 2-3 tbsp of icing sugar
• about 1/2 cup of oats

Method:

• Heat vegetable oil shortening in a pan on the stove-top (medium heat).  When the shortening has liquefied add the chocolate squares, stirring.
• When everything is liquid stir in the icing sugar and oats.  You may need to add more oats to create a stiffer mixture.
• Remove from heat.  Spoon mixture (in spoonfuls) onto a baking pan and set aside to solidify at room temperature.  I imagine you could refrigerate for faster results, but I prefer food at room temperature these days and also since I am conserving heat, my apartment is about fridge temperature.
• For extra fun, I poured hot water into the pan after spooning out the macaroons.  Then I poured the remaining chocolate residue into a cup - hot chocolate!

they sparkle!

Day 71 - Overindulgences

This winter weather has me in a hoarding state of mind.  Whenever I come across food, I completely over-eat like a bear preparing for winter hibernation!  It's as if my body convinces my mind that it might not eat again and so we must overindulge NOW.

On that note, I received a coupon booklet which includes a free small McDonald's specialty beverage!  I cashed it in this afternoon for a small hot chocolate!  It was soooo good!  So good that I went rummaging through the garbage near my apartment and found four more!

I used to worry a lot about what I ate - whether I was choosing healthy items, whether I would get fat from what I was eating.  Living this way the past 2 months, I have let that go to a large degree.  I am starting to believe that maybe it's enough to wake up everyday, do what you want, and then go to bed.

Day 69 - Banana Bread Surprise

I realise I have been 'saving' food the way that you don't use good china or silverware unless you have company.  As such, my fridge reeks of liquefied bananas. Aligning with the idea of abundance, there is always enough.  On the other hand, what about being pragmatic?  Too much thinking.  Better off making a beautiful pan of banana bread!

(I inadvertently deleted a lot of my recipes from the 'Recipes' page.  I was going to make the blackberry banana muffins from the first month.  Instead I will share this new recipe here to avoid that particular type of accident.)

I took multiple pictures and every single one was blurry

Ingredients:

• 3 tsp baking powder
• 1 tsp clove powder (maybe less because it cancels out other flavours)
• 1 tsp cinammon
• 1 cup flour
• 1/2 cup ground flax seeds
• 3 near-liquid bananas (very ripe)
• 1/4 cup oil
• 1/4 cup icing sugar
• handful of goji berries
• handful of crushed walnuts

Method:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
• Oil the baking pan.
• Mix the dry ingredients in a bowl.  Grind the flax seeds and add to the dry ingredients.
• Add the goji berries and walnuts.  Mix well.
• Puree bananas and add to the dry ingredients.
• Add oil.  Mix well.
• Pour batter into the oiled pan and set the timer for 35 minutes.
• About 5 plays of Stairway to Heaven later, let set and enjoy the surprise!

Day 65 - Goji Surprise

This afternoon I decided to snack on nuts and goji berries.  What I found was an unexpected protein source in the form of moth larvae.  There was some cotton web-type of film sticking around some of the berries and that's when I spotted my little worm-friend wending its way around my bowl of nuts and berries.  It must have hatched recently because I had eaten them earlier in the week and didn't see any signs of creatures.  I checked because of the backpack taste.

I threw out that particular bowl but not the bag.  I feel like I could cook them into my waffles in the morning and avoid moving and visible evidence.  My other concern is that other items might get spoiled from introducing these critters into my kitchen.  For now, I will keep the goji berry bag out of the cupboard and on the counter.

Day 63 -1 banana, 2 banana, 3 banana, BUNCH!

My sister who works at Starbucks encountered a massive find - a bag of 'spoiled' bananas in the garbage (near the top and in a bag)!  She brought them home and made banana bread and muffins and then offered me the rest.  I love that she is now cool with taking stuff from the garbage :-)

I consider myself more spoiled than these bananas

I have in mind a themed breakfast, like banana pancakes with Jack Johnson.

Day 62 - Sea Veggies

My boyfriend's living situation is an un-televised union of MTV's The Real World and Survivor.  He lives in a house with others where they all work together, but often leave abruptly for various reasons.  Tomb raiding their culinary effects is a natural side-effect.  The first pillage has added items such as 1/3 of a bag of red lentils, 1/2 a container of cream cheese, a box of wheat thins, 6 stoned wheat crackers, 2 stroop waffles, 4 babel cheese rounds, nuts and goji berries that taste like they have been in a backpack, and the most interesting: 2 bags of bull kelp and 2 bags of winged kelp.

Gifts from the sea

Beyond the nori that holds the pieces of my sushi in place, I have never eaten kelp.  This kelp is from Dakini Tidal Wilds on Vancouver Island.  Tonight I ate some of the bull kelp dry from the bag and it was pretty salty.  Reconstituting it and squeezing a lemon over it made it a hell of a lot more palatable.  As a non-seafood eater, my mouth eschews the alien taste and texture.  However, given the nutritional benefits, including high iron content, I will give it the proverbial go.  After my last blood test, foods with higher iron were something I had been manifesting for my meals, and look what floated my way...

Day 61 - Yam Fries

From that yam with all the growths, I made yam fries!  They were so awesome.  The yam was pretty dry on account of being so old - cutting it into pieces and slathering those in olive oil and spices hid this fact nicely.  Check out this super-easy yam-my recipe!

This isn't the most appetizing picture, but I assure you: most delicious!

Day 60 - Under the Mistletoe

Justin Bieber's new Christmas album came out November 1st.  My sister bought it but couldn't figure out how to port it to her iPod.  In exchange for my help in this matter, my dad gave me this:

The yam my dad gave me

Day 56 - Sugar Cube(d)

If 'sugar' was a field on blood test results, the reading would indicate that my blood could be kool-aid once you added water to the concentrate.  Being an instructor at Kumon during Hallowe'en week has meant cookies, cupcakes, and treats everyday (if you click the link, you can see the table with all the treats from our Hallowe'en party)!  Parents have brought us seasonal baked goods by the dozen.  It's been awesome.  And it gets better.

McDonald's has free premium arabica coffee until November 6th!  While waiting in line, I noticed that McDonald's has self-serve drink fountains.  I also noticed that most patrons leave their cups sitting on the ground outside or other places that are not the garbage.  It would be so easy to grab a cup and fill, as they have a free re-fill policy.  The thing is, I can't stand soft drinks.  As it is, I get pretty jittery from the coffee.  I really can't bring myself to indulge in the fountain drinks - not enough sustenance to defy this aversion.

Sugary foods are truly the most freely abundant and as we know, dangerous.  When I take sugar and caffeine, I can feel my body chemistry change.  I feel something shift in my brain.  It's like being on drugs.  I notice that when kids at the centre have eaten Hallowe'en candy before/during class, the energy of the room changes.  Yes, they are little bundles of hyperactivity, but there's something else.  It's like they are drunk.  They are less inhibited and their eyes get glassy.

I am the first person to over-indulge in sweet foods, especially when skies are gray and holidays abound.  It's an easy way to feel a little peppier and satiated.  I know that I crave sugar because I often don't eat enough or I don't eat enough complex carbs, proteins, and fat.  This month I am going to make a conscious effort to decrease my sugar intake.  At the same time, if I continue to eat a lot of sugary foods, I'm not going to get all down about it.  This is all part of the experiment and I am approaching it with a curious mind.  My hypothesis is that such an increase in sugar will soon have some visibly negative consequences.

This Sunday my strata is holding a Coffee Time event with treats.  I am manifesting a massive veggie platter with slices of toasted 7 grain baguette.

Day 55 - Blood Test Results (October)

Results look good.  Not too different from last month.  There were improvements in the MCV, MCH, and MCHC count, which was my goal.  My platelet and white blood cell count are lower, though.  Not sure what that means, but they are not drastically lower.  Ferritin is still in the 'probably iron deficiency' range, so I will have to figure something out there. 

October Blood Test Results

I have gained weight, probably because I eat whatever I can.  I don't read labels anymore.  Halloween has been a wonderful time to store fat -- cookies and cupcakes and fun-size chocolate, galore!  Looking forward to what November brings.  'Be curious' is how I intend to proceed.

Day 51 - Walmart Super-Centre Super-Star

Enjoyed a piece of super-iced Grand Opening Walmart cake at 8am whilst getting lost amongst the produce and myriad deals.  The camera I brought to take pictures had a zoom and a lens, the whole deal, but I guess I hadn't bothered to charge it.  This is why there aren't any pictures of the giant cake.  It was pretty low-key - no cheerleaders, no Beyonce, no Nickelback.

The Walmart expansion has the Walmart about a block closer to my house; it's a minute less time to walk there.  Wandering around there this morning had me wondering if I like this.  I don't know where the people in the store came from.  I have lived in Guildford for a while and I tend to recognize the same people in the area, often even know their first name and dvd rental history.  This morning I saw no one I know - Not even the pre-Super-centre Walmart employees.  It was a little spooky, like being in Ladner.

Day 49 - Deepawali Curry Feast

 I was planning to get my second blood test today, but I didn't plan my daily YML (Yoga, Meditation, Library) well enough.  It's like GTL, except instead of Gym and Tan, I do Yoga and Meditation.  However you begin, in the end you end up at the Library.  The truth is that I experience some anxiety when it comes to drawing blood from my body.  Tomorrow looks like a better day...

To Lakshmi, purveyor of shakti

Today marks Deepawali, the festival of lights.  I can't think of a better way to acknowledge this celebration of harvest, light, and benevolence than a super-abundant curry feast!

Om Shanti.

Day 48 - Vanity Saves

I have been pretty sick the last few days with some kind of sinus infection/flu.  I was planning on getting my blood test too.  I think it will be tomorrow that I do it; felt crappy enough that I'd rather err on the side of caution -  I am grateful to feel some vitality in these bones again!

In other news, the washing machine at my parent's place is broken.  It floods and then it doesn't go through a spin cycle, meaning the load is a sopping wet mess and can't be dried unless hand-wrung.  Fortunately for me, my washing machine works and my youngest sister likes clean clothes.  She sent her laundry over to my place where I agreed to be her Chinese laundromat.  Naturally, the price was steep for re-living such a painful chapter of my ancestral history.

Cauliflower, Bananas, Onion, Carrots

There was also one-third of a bag of slimy mini-carrots and some lettuce.  To prevent any further spoilage, I had to cook those into a lovely chop-suey.  I am particularly excited about the cauliflower.  This could feed a family for 3 days or one person for a week.  I am dreaming it into a curry or perhaps faux-mashed-potatoes.  Maybe both.  It's bigger than my head and the dreams it dreams.

Day 45 - My Dad Cleans the Fridge

Went to my parent's house on Thursday for some watercress soup.  Incidentally, my dad decided to clean his fridge and I ended up with some great items he would have otherwise discarded! 

Half a tofu brick, a few blueberries, shitake mushrooms, expired bread

I mentioned the puffball mushrooms and he gave me half a bag of shitake mushrooms (which he would not have ordinarily discarded).  In exchange, I gave him a jar of freshly brewed Kombucha!

Black Tea Kombucha

Day 42 - Kombucha Babies

Does anyone want to trade food for kombucha babies?  I have two for trade.  They are very healthy and love people.  Please contact me if you are interested :-)

Day 41 - Apple Festival in Whalley-Hood

UBC hosted its annual Apple Festival this past weekend, showcasing the splendor and variety of this lovely fruit.  I was sorry to have missed it, but what happened today made up for it.

On my way home from the Central City Library, I stopped by Save-On Foods because I was craving cake in the worst way.  I figured that if I could look at the cakes and smell them, it would be sufficient sensory input to simulate having eaten the cakes.  It's vaguely pornographic, I know.  Anyhow, as I exited the store, I found everything really expensive.  I feel like inflation could not have happened that quickly and I must be unaccustomed to purchasing food.  Experts claim it takes 21 days to make or break a habit and tomorrow will be twice that number of days (yay!).

I felt satiated.  It worked.  I decided to take the woodsy way home, down 100th street.  This is where I noticed a number of yard waste garbage bags and what, in the darkness, looked like a potato on top?  I began to dig through the yard clippings.  Apples.  Wild organic apples with some spots.  I grabbed as many as I could fit in my bag and the ones without slugs and sludgy bits.  Guess who was going to have some dessert before the night's end?

The apples and one pear

Gluten-Free Wild Apple Crumble

The cores

The cores as liquid gold (aka apple cider)

Day 40 - Christmas Wishlist Item

On Sunday I went to my parents' garden and dug up some leftover carrots and potatoes!  I also amassed a bundle of dandelion greens and really tough kale chewed up by slugs.  I figure that I can at least juice what remains of the leaves and the stalks.  I also discovered puffball mushrooms (lycoperdon pyriforme) growing in between the patio cracks!  The last time I thought I found one, it turned out to be an amanita - deadly.  This time I looked my specimen over very carefully before eating it raw this morning.  It's been hours later and I feel terrific - edible!  It didn't taste great, kind of musty, but had a great texture...like luxuriously dense bread.  I will go back to collect more to sauté in oil.

My last few posts have been very anti-consumerist and probably come across as a little elitist.  To balance things out, I am sharing one of my Christmas wish-list items, incidentally once a showcase item on a highly consumer-driven program (you see it within the first 10 seconds):

If I had this popcorn cart, I would mainly have it right beside my bed.  On sunny days, I would walk it through the park and delight all with fresh popcorn.  Eventually the citizens of Surrey would want me to run for mayor because of this.  My modesty would prevent me from doing so; nevertheless, Gord Downie would write a song about my cart, and the city would probably erect a statue or paint a commemorative mural.

Day 38 - Lovely Day for a Tea Party

Today I taught a yoga class where the theme was 'occupy your body'.  By being present and connected to source, we can know and express our personal truth, whether that be protesting or not.  It was well-received :-)

On the way home from this class, I walked past the VAG.  The weather was beautiful and so was the entertainment, despite Mao's claim that revolution is not a tea party.  Guess what?  The Christmas Starbucks cups are out!  It wasn't so much a tea party, I guess, as much as a university campus clubs day.  There was hackey sack, a drum circle, random people with clever and poignant signs trying to get others to care about their cause.  No one seemed particularly interested in being there.  Many people with signs almost looked kind of sheepish, like it was some kind of joke.  At the Skytrain platform, around 3 pm, people waited for the train, signs and flags neatly folded, ready to head home (maybe in time for hockey). 

I realise my last post was probably a little cynical and harsh.  I really wanted to go and prove to myself that these people believed in something and that this was their truth.  Sadly, I didn't see that.  I don't think the general public wants change.

"For everything you want in life, there is a price you must pay, in full and in advance. Decide what you really want and then determine the price you'll have to pay to achieve it...Whatever you want you'll have to pay a price measured in terms of: sacrifice, time, effort and personal discipline. Decide what it is and start paying that price today." 

-- Brian Tracy

There is a price to pay for the kind of change some people want and I don't think it will come from simply occupying the VAG lawn (unless Starbucks/Tim Hortons/McDs/Walmart has to shut down because they can't find anyone to run their stores, as they are all protesting).  I truly believe that the price is abstaining from corporate products - from gas, iPhones etc.  It is very simple and something that has been said countless times.  I know it isn't easy -- the past month has been tough, and it's only food (which I love).

Instead of 'Buy Nothing Day', it needs to be 'Buy Nothing Month'.  If everyone who 'occupied Vancouver' or any other city today could support one another in doing this, I think the 99% would have a stronger voice.  The problem is that we can't bear to sacrifice comfort and convenience.  The truth, it seems, is as bitter as finding out that horse chestnuts are inedible.

Day 37 - Abandon Wall Street

October 15th (tomorrow) the Occupy Wall Street movement comes to the Vancouver Art Gallery and environs.  I was thinking about checking it out:  I am a disenfranchised university graduate dissatisfied with the status quo.  In particular, the way we love things and use people.  This protest is kind of an umbrella-protest against just everything that is wrong with the world.  It's like throwing a tantrum because everyone and everything is unfair and you are really frustrated and don't know how to fix anything.  Like the hockey riots, it's a cry for help with the real issue being spiritual malaise.

At any rate, I have decided that 'Abandoning Wall Street' seems like a better idea.  Why not stop buying things?  'Wall Street' and most people pay attention when their money is at stake.  This is the issue, right?  People with money and 'power' making decisions from their wallets rather than their sense of conscience.  Stop buying shit and see what happens to the stock market. 

Stop going to the grocery store.  I think the Post-Apocalyptic lifestyle is a much better form of protest.  I noticed that the Occupy Vancouver Wishlist includes many shelter and electronic items, but no food items.  Maybe I missed the part about the hunger strike.

How much food will the protesters purchase as they occupy the city?  The profit from that food goes right into the pockets of the shareholders of SBUX(Starbucks), KFT(Kraft), MCD(McDonald's) and many others.  In conclusion, I think Occupy Whatever is a waste of time and effort if change is the true objective.

Day 36 - The Only Cure for the Blues...

...Is more chocolate!

A few years ago, Jessica Seinfeld (yeah, Jerry Seinfeld's wife) came out with this cookbook titled, Deceptively Delicious with recipes like spinach cupcakes and black-bean brownies.  The goal was to trick children into eating nutritiously without even knowing it!  Trés sneaky!  Having on hand a ton of cooked azuki beans, I decided to attempt something in that vein, azuki bean brownies...

Azuki Bean Brownie

They don't look very appetizing, but I assure you, they are tasty in that vegan-healthy kind of way.  Did I mention they also happen to be gluten-free?  I've been making a lot of waffles lately; I am trying to conserve how much flour I use, which means gluten-free is wonderful by my books.

Day 35 - Bored

Realized that I've been eating a lot because I am bored.  Ordinarily, I would just be anxious about getting fat and come up with some kind of torture and deprivation regime, but the anxiety now extends to supply-related issues.  It could have been the full moon, it might have been the congo -  I decided that bangs would be the perfect solution to everything.  If they didn't turn out, I could obsess over that and divert my attention to fixing them.  If they did turn out, my self-esteem might see a nice boost and maybe I'd eat less.  Either way, this seemed like a great idea.

When I woke up this morning, I saw that my hair is now a symptom of the general indecisiveness ruling my life.  I cut one side too short, as often happens when you self-cut.  But, I liked the longer side so much that I couldn't quite bring myself to match the lengths.

The shorter side

The longer side

The front

I think I should keep it like this as a reminder to be more decisive.  This will be my wrist tattoo that says 'courage' or 'silence' or whatever.  Besides, asymmetry is still considered high fashion, n'est-ce pas?

Day 34 - The B12 Solution

This Thanksgiving my sister who is going to be the world's best physiotherapist, told me that our bodies store B12!  This means that I can ingest a lot of B12 in one sitting and that B12 will be doled out to as my body requires it.  The body is so intelligent. 

The take-home message is that I don't need to 'ration' B12-rich foods; in fact, it would be best to consume them all now and rest assured that over the next few months that is all taken care of.  The trick is to figure out how much is enough.  While you can't have too much B12, over-consumption is rather wasteful in the current climate.  From Wikipedia, the recommended daily intake is 2 to 3 mcg.  Each packet of Emergen-C has 25 mcg.  So, I need about 180 mcg total (upper-bound estimate), which is about 8 packages of Emergen-C and I have more than that many.  Problem solved.

The anti-anemia triumvirate is folate, B12, and iron.  These are necessary for red blood cells, which do important things like carry oxygen through the body.  Dizziness, weakness, fatigue is due to a lack of oxygen.  I believe I have all three covered and look forward to my next blood test results. 

Day 33 - Chicken Paninis

This Thanksgiving Saturday while working at Kumon, I discovered a dumpster of Chicken Paninis (and garbage)!  I was hesitant at first, since I didn't know how long they had been in the dumpster, however with the weather the way it is, a dumpster is similar to an 'ice box'.  I wasn't going to eat them, being a vegetarian, but saw rather the market-opportunity to barter with the omnivores in my life.  My sister came out shortly, wondering why the garbage run was taking so long.  I showed her the find and seeing the expression on her face, left them there.  The new rule is: No dumpster-diving in my work shirt or near business hours.

This is a $6 sandwich!

Day 31 - Still Alive?

One month later and I am still alive.  Visited the dentist and she says my oral situation is indicative of someone with not enough B12.  I looked up B12 and the reason I have not been updating is likely due to this deficiency.  I seem to get tired rather quickly and prone to kind of negative moods.  My original B12 plan was kombucha (and it is flourishing!).  The only problem is that the B-vitamins kombucha produces are B 1, 2, 3.  I will instead be taking the Emergen-Cs that have B12.

I have been eating a lot of waffles lately.  I love lakes of syrup in my waffles and so now I don't have very much left.  I am thinking of getting some syrup from McDonald's tomorrow morning.

What I miss most (besides cake) is social eating -- the thrill of choice: choosing a restaurant; deliberating over menu items; customizing a Subway sandwich.  Yesterday I was feeling a little low (no Emergen-Cs on hand) and I ordered a soy tea misto from Starbucks, knowing that the soy would be fortified with B12.  How fortunate I was to encounter the last operational Starbucks before it was demolished.  Definitely miss the luxury of this.

I have been thinking about this project and some of the feedback I've received.  This idea seems completely normal to me, yet I often encounter a reaction of disbelief and horror.  I accepted this as a lack of ascetic resolve and sense of adventure on part of the critic.  My sister told me that my dad asked two questions when he learned of my project: Does she need money?  Is she lonely?  The first question makes sense, but the second is puzzling.  I guess what I am saying is that I am questioning my sanity and reason for doing this.  I then start to wonder if my mind is asking this because the project is getting a little difficult.  And, is this type of over-analysis the by-product of loneliness?  More practice required.

Not sure what I will make for Thanksgiving yet...but it will involve blackberries or azuki beans.  Quite possibly some variant of Kale and Azuki Bean Salad or Azuki Paste.

Day 26 - Free Taco Day

Oh, I almost forgot to post about the free tacos!  On the way home from my sister's Kumon centre, we spied a sign for free tacos.  At first, the other occupants in the car were skeptical because it was a sign made out of cardboard and they probably thought it was some kind of trap.  I get that.  You could trick a lot of people to Pickton farms that way.  BUT, there was another sign and I refused to let it go.  The last time I 'let it go' and now we don't have a canoe.  That's right, my sister refused to stop to pick up a perfectly good canoe from a dumpster.

Anyway, despite the home-made signs, it was free taco day at Taco Del Mar establishment in Clayton Heights (some kind of anniversary).  There was barely a line. I guess other people were put off by the less-than-legit-looking signs and that worked to our advantage.  Like most things, tacos taste so much better free :-)

Day 24 - Korean Dogwood

One of my favourite Devendra Banhart songs is now one of my favourite foraged fruits. 

Known as a 'Kousa Dogwood', 'Korean Dogwood', 'Chinese Dogwood', or 'Japanese Dogwood', this tree produces edible fruit. 

Day 23 - What is this?

I found this berry near the complex where I live and I don't know what it is, but it looks like a yoshi-berry and it is delicious.

The middle is sweet and has a texture like the inside of a peach.  There are 3 little pits inside.

Day 22 - I See Plants and Animals!

Today I woke up wondering if the chestnuts lining city streets are ready for picking.  Then I went to query google, only to realize what I need to do is take a walk :-) 

Since I've been actively looking for food from trees and shrubs, I've become more aware of non-human life.  As I pass by trees, I try to identify if they might be oaks with acorns and if so, how long until the acorns turn from green to brown.  If I see a red berry, I might take a bite, study the leaves and the stalks and return home to figure out the name.  It's like seeing individual faces and shaking hands instead of passively looking through a crowd of blurry people.

I am sure there are many wonderful books out there that expound this exact point: that by relying on stores for food we have become less dependent on nature and lost our connection to plant and animal life and the rhythms of seasons.  When we don't need nature, it's easy to be cavalier with the well-being of these friends; it's easier to say, 'there's an empty lot, lets dump stuff in it', rather than 'let's plant a garden'.

Days 18 & 19 - Birthday Potluck

This weekend I celebrated the birthdays of my sister's fiance and my mom.  I made a delicious rhubarb, blackberry crumble with an apple I found while picking the blackberries.  This is the end of blackberry season, for sure.  There were bugs making blackberry hives and bees sucking nectar and giant spiders spinning webs between the brambles.  I was glad to make this last foray and excited to find a tree with little green apples on it!

Wild Birthday Crumble

I think potluck dinners are the wave of the post-apocalyptic future.  The community sharing aspect is in direct alignment with abundance.  There was more than enough food and there was a wonderful variety!

I even foraged a bit in my parent's backyard and came away with: lettuce, grapes, apples, and a zucchini!

Lettuce, Apples, Zucchini, also Lavender

Grapes from my parent's yard

I found choke cherries near my condo, that while edible, are a little tart.  I'm not sure what I will do once I collect the rest.  Looking forward to chestnuts and acorns.

Day 17 - Moon Time

I started my period and while this may seem like a total overshare, I assure you, it is not.  This is confirmation that yesterday's episode was a result of hormonal fluctuations.  Keeping in mind the blood test results, during this time I have resolved to take special care to eat meals loaded with iron and b-vitamins.  Today, for example, I had raw dandelion greens on squash and couscous with kombucha tea!

Also note that I would commit a number of illicit acts for chocolate-covered pretzels.  The concept of craving what I don't have is interesting to observe.  More so during this time, I see the tendency to think negatively and self-indulgently, to be less present.  I find the best thing to do is to relax (lie down, do gentle yoga, minimize noise).  When I don't feel as much physical tension, this want softens and I am content with tea.  Who is this negative and self-indulgent being anyways?  I don't know, but it is fiendishly thinking about melting down unsweetened Baker's chocolate squares with sugar packets from Starbucks. 

Day 16 - Taking Stock

Woke up this morning violently ill with a fever, chills, and excruciating abdominal pain, thinking I was dying from improper food preparation.  It's funny now because I feel fine and because I am actually Food Safe Certified.  When in pain, the mind likes to play out the most dramatic scenarios and prey on our deepest pits of fear.  Inhale.  Exhale.  Feel the pain and be with it.  Then wonder why you don't have any drugs in the house.  Just kidding.

Confession time: I worked at my sister's Kumon centre today and ate pizza that wasn't foraged.  However, it was in exchange for labour and I had a terrible morning; I'm going to justify this minor infraction of the rules, and suppose a really high coefficient of friction on this slippery slope.

Threw out the sprouts because it has been more than 6 days and they smell like feces.  Dehydrated some lavender for tea.  When I find a moment, I will take the flowers off the stalks and store them in a pretty jar.  I also made orange juice from 3 oranges.  It was amazing...like my home is some kind of Orange Julius stand with bendy straws and foamy orange juice!